The 10 Douchiest Job Titles in America

The 10 Douchiest Job Titles of 2012

For as long as I can remember I’ve wanted to keep my business cards free of my title. I feel this way for a couple of reasons: primarily, I don’t want those outside of my company getting hung up on my title; also, I really don’t give a shit what you call me inside the company; so long as the work is challenging and fun – and that my role can somehow influence the company’s results.

Of course, I understand I’m in the minority here. There’s an episode of Cheers that humorously magnifies America’s love for important sounding job titles when Woody, Sam and Carla individually go into Rebecca’s office to demand a raise; only to come out overly satisfied with nothing more than artificial titles.

So, while I get why some people want a title and want to proudly display it on their business cards, I struggle to understand why anyone would want a title that basically screams to the world “Hey, look at me: I’m a major douchebag.”

Do you have a douchie title or do you know someone with a douchie title? If so, please share them here. For now, here is my list of The 10 Douchiest Job Titles of 2012:

10. Lifetime Value Business Leader – This title is douchie for so many reasons, not the least of which is that I have no fucking idea what it means. To me, this title sounds more like something that would be inscribed on a crappy award you get from the Fort Wayne, Indiana, Chamber of Commerce than something you would print on a business card. Chances are, if you’re a Lifetime Value Business Leader, you probably can’t lead and likely provide no value to your business (even in the short term).

9. Talent Acquisition Expert – I have two major problems with this total douche bag title: first, if your title shows that you are an “expert” anything it means you are exactly the opposite; and second, the title “Talent Acquisition Expert” springs from the same political correctness that brought us such classic douchebag titles as “Sanitation Engineer” and Subway’s oxymoronic “Sandwich Artist.”

8. Director of Customer Experience – Taking care of customers should be Job One for everyone at your company; but if your business actually names someone their Director of Customer Experience, your front line employees are likely just paying lip service to the actual customer experience. Of course, that’s not what makes this title so douchie. What makes this title really douchie is that the role can only be filled by complete and utter douchebags. Think about it: have you ever met a Director of Customer Experience who didn’t annoy the fuck out of everyone around them? Sickie sweet phoniness does not make for a great customer experience.

7. Chief Motivational Officer – Similarly to the Director of Customer Experience role, if your company needs anyone with any variation of the word “motivation” in their title, then you have a real motivation problem. In fact, your lack of genuinely motivated people will not be solved by giving some made-up title to someone who cannot execute; but he’s really fucking nice so you named him your Chief Motivational Officer. Fire this guy and use the money you save to buy the employees a pool table for the break room and pizza every Friday.

6. Entrepreneur – This title is certainly douchie on the surface: it screams “look at me; I’m a real risk-taking maverick.” Yet these risk-taking mavericks who call themselves entrepreneurs are using the more cultural (mostly incorrect) definition of the word as “someone who starts a business that promises economic gain, but also entails great risk.” In fact, the word actually describes any manager or owner of a business – regardless of actual risk or gain. Putting “entrepreneur” on your card is equivalent to putting the non-descript “manager” as your title; only way more douchie.

5. Company Evangelist – The only people who should be allowed to have “evangelist” on their business cards are those hell-bent on saving our souls and taking our money. (Just taking our money is not enough to make you an evangelist.) In all seriousness, if you don’t spend your Sundays on television speaking to a bunch of sheep and fleecing them of their life savings, then you need to leave this off your business card.

4. Guru – The word is Sanskrit, and if you did not know that, then you’re not a fucking Guru. Moreover, this type of douchebag title is one of the “self-anointed” kinds. This means that no one ever called you a Guru (unless their tongue was firmly planted in their cheek) – you gave yourself this title; and for that, you are a douchebag of the highest order. In fact, you might just be the Guru of douchieness.

3. Mentor – What in the world would prompt someone to put this drivel on their card as their title? It is the job of everyone in your company to mentor to those with less seniority, knowledge or experience than themselves. However, if any douchebag put “Mentor” as their job title on their business card, then they are just announcing to the world that they really value their experience and opinions a whole lot more than the rest of us. I can honestly say that I have not learned a thing from a single person who ever “tried” to be a mentor to me. The true mentors in my life never tried, it just came naturally to them – and they gladly mentored without fanfare or the need to be officially called a mentor.

2. Visionary – Putting this on your card literally screams that what you lack more than anything else is vision. Because… if you had any vision at all, you’d see what a douchebag you look like with this on your card. Let me break this to you gently: being right about a few things does NOT make you a fucking visionary; knowing more than your boss about technology or the Internet does NOT make you a fucking visionary. “Visionary” is a title people bestow upon you at death (think Steve Jobs), not something you call yourself when you’re still alive and annoying the rest of us.

1. Thought Leader – The King of all douchebags, the “Thought Leader,” is another self-anointed position. Those who use this title to describe themselves really see their place in your industry as Socrates meets Einstein. They believe – generally because they have a below-average IQ – that they are both philosopher and genius. While the rest of us see the obvious for what it is, the self-proclaimed “thought leaders” point out the ordinary as if they’ve cracked the genetic code. Deep inside I think many “thought leaders” are truly just “do nothings” who gave themselves the title of “thought leader” because they don’t want to do any real work; they just want to regurgitate what others have published.

Generally speaking, I think the Internet magnifies the self-importance that the douchebags who proudly display any of my Top Ten douchie titles tends to feel and feed upon. Make no mistake, I get that many of you who read this think I’m a douchebag for my often ranting style of writing. The difference between me and the douchebags that might desire one of the above as their titles is that I know whatever I write will be douchie to someone.

Of course, if you happen to be one who thinks my writing is douchie, then I feel good that I could help you feel superior to someone; even if it is just some douchebag who rants when he writes…

Gallup Poll: Business Executives Lack Honesty and Integrity

“Business Executives” Rank Low in Annual Honesty and Ethics Poll

While nurses topped the list for the seventh consecutive year, business executives earned relatively poor grades in the latest installment of the annual integrity poll from Gallup.

The poll, which surveyed just over 1,000 US adults earlier this month, asked respondents how they would rate the honesty and ethical standards of people in one of twenty-one different professions. Lobbyists were dead last for the second consecutive year, followed closely by telemarketers and car salesmen. To see the entire list, follow this link.

The list of professions included in the Gallup poll reads somewhat like the results one might expect to see when a classroom of first graders are asked “what do you want to be when you grow up?” Adding princess, fireman, and army soldier would probably round out the possibilities for any group of six-year olds.

Funny thing about Gallup’s choice of professions; some, like “high school teachers,” are quite specific; while others, like “business executives,” are incredibly vague.

While none of the AskTheManager.com editors would argue against the need for more honesty and higher ethics in business, we are a little confused by Gallup’s use of the seemingly all-inclusive term “business executives.”

Liars, Damn Liars, and Pollsters

Just who are these “business executives” anyway? Are they Dick Fuld and the late Kenneth Lay? Are they P. Diddy and Donald Trump? Are they the millions of business owners, CEOs, COOs, presidents, vice presidents and other executives whose jobs are so different from one another that they hardly can be classified in fifty categories, let alone a single one?

We suspect that most of the 1,010 US adults who lack caller ID (otherwise, why would they answer a call from a pollster?) pictured some sinister, overweight, overpaid, cigar-chomping CEO of a bankrupt company when they were asked their opinion of business executives. Of course business executives ranked low.

While one can easily group extremely similar positions together to identify such professions as nurses, car salesmen, policemen, funeral directors, pharmacists, telemarketers, and real estate agents; we find ourselves struggling to identify what Gallup means by the nebulous group “business executives.”

It’s all in the Headlines




In 2001 (and only in 2001) this particular Gallup poll included the category “firefighters.” Not surprisingly, firefighters overwhelmingly topped all other professions that year (the poll was taken about two months after 9/11). This begs the question: Did the Gallup organization exploit the tragedy of 9/11 and the sudden popularity of firefighters for the sake of a more compelling headline?

Only Gallup knows for sure. Overall, we think this is a quaint little poll of very little value. Many of the twenty-one professions appear to be included merely to provide fodder for talk radio hosts and bloggers. Why else would Gallup include funeral directors and not coroners; lawyers and not judges; telemarketers and not convenience store clerks; or bankers and not bakers? Why only twenty-one professions?

Perhaps if Gallup were interested in delivering public opinions worthy of action, they might change their annual integrity poll to include hundreds of professions instead of just twenty-one. This should add a level of validity the current poll does not enjoy.

May we also suggest Gallup find suitable replacements for the ill-defined “business executives?” Perhaps the categories “Fortune 500 CEOs,” “small business owners,” “cartoon villains,” “mid-level managers,” “board members,” “white-collar criminals,” and “junior executives” would cover all possibilities.

Oh Yeah, Let’s Add One More Profession…

Lest we forget, we think it might be appropriate for Gallup to add one more profession to next year’s annual integrity poll: pollsters. Of course, we suspect they wouldn’t be happy with the results.

 

Obama, McCain, Biden or Palin – Who’s the Best Leader?

 

Which Presidential or Vice Presidential Hopeful Would Make the Best Leader?

 

Over the past several days, the editors of AskTheManager.com released their leadership ratings and rankings of all forty-two US Presidents from Washington to Bush. We examined how these men would perform as the CEO of a Fortune 500 company by using what we believe are some of the most important leadership characteristics: humility; delegation; integrity; vision; success (during their term); and (impact on) future (generations).

 

(To see our first article, ranking the Presidents from Worst to First, follow this link. To read the detailed comments showing why we ranked each President where we did, please follow this link. If you’re interested on how each President scored in the six weighted categories, please follow this link.)

 

As we grow closer to the November 4, 2008 Presidential Election, the real question for America is where would Barack Obama, John McCain, Joe Biden or Sarah Palin rank on this list? With the current economic climate and uncertain foreign affairs, it’s clear we need a leader. Because of this, it becomes more and more important each day for Americans to ask hard questions about their candidate of choice.

 

Where would your candidate or their running mate rank in terms of business leadership in the new millennium? Could he or she successfully run a large corporation today? Do they have what it takes to be a true leader or are they more concerned about themselves and their legacy?

 

More importantly, will their decisions be sound and founded on unwavering principles, or will they constantly be swayed by the winds of political expediency and public opinion?

 

Running the United States and running a large, for-profit corporation have more similarities than differences. Because this is a website dedicated to developing business leaders, we needed to know who would we choose to run our company if we had our pick of the four candidates vying for President and Vice President.




 

The Rankings – Worst to First

 

4. Joseph Biden    

A single allegation of plagiarism could be partisan politics gone awry. More than one, and we start to see a pattern. While we really like Joe Biden, we cannot help but be put off by his alleged lack of integrity and the appearance of political machinations. Similar to McCain in that he’s served many years in leadership roles in the Senate, Biden is no maverick and tows the party line to a fault. Of the four Presidential and Vice Presidential hopefuls left in the race, Joe Biden is clearly the least qualified leader. His score of 67.5 (see the category ratings below) would put him well below average at number 31 on the all time list.

 

3. Barack Obama   

We’re always worried when we see a potential leader who wants nothing more than to be in charge. Often they will say or do anything to get the job. Once there, they find they lack the necessary skill set to truly lead. While Obama clearly has the most vision of this foursome, we’re concerned that an Obama Presidency will not lay the proper groundwork for future success. We do believe his integrity is greater than that of John McCain, but he’s still no Lincoln. With a score of 77.5, Obama would rank as an above average Presidential Leader.

 

2. Sarah Palin         

A total and complete surprise when selected as the Vice Presidential candidate for the Republican Party just last week, there is little we really know about Sarah Palin. What we do know and what we’ve heard, we actually like. Palin clearly does not tow the party line. Even more so than McCain, Palin is a true maverick. Her decisions seem to be based on what is best for her constituents and she seems unafraid to make enemies in Washington – something America has needed for the last two decades. Her perceived lack of humility hurts her, though on our list Palin would still rank as the 24th best Presidential Leader of all time (just behind another leader without humility – Theodore Roosevelt).

 

1. John McCain      

The most humble leader of the four, we believe McCain will also do the best job at delegating responsibilities (not completely unlike Ronald Reagan). What we like best about McCain is that most in his party would prefer to have someone else to vote for – he does not tow the party line (despite what the Obama commercials say). Of course, he is not without blemish, and the alleged backroom dealings around the Central Arizona Project and Charles Keating make us question his integrity. That said, with a score of 82.5, John McCain would rank as the 20th best Presidential Leader of all time (just behind James Madison).

 

How Did They Rate?

 

To determine the final rankings, we graded each Presidential and Vice Presidential hopeful in six weighted categories (below), awarding a score of 1 to 10 in each category. A score of 10 indicates this candidate shows true and complete leadership in a particular skill set.

 

Humility (H) – Great leaders today avoid the spotlight (unless it benefits their company), give credit to their subordinates, and generally drive their businesses through character and vision rather than ego and pride. We considered the amount of unhealthy ego and overbearing pride in each of the four hopefuls to determine the grade in this category.

 

Delegation (D) – No one person can do it all, that’s why great leaders are also great at delegation. They thrive on allowing others to make decisions, and they empower nearly everyone through their words and their actions. We graded each candidate on what we believe is their ability to let go and leave some of the duties to their staff.

 

Integrity (I) – Great leaders are principled, and they adhere to a strict moral and ethical code. They exude character because of their honest, forthright nature; and they never put themselves above the needs of their team or company. Our assessment and category grades are based on each candidate’s record with respect to character and honesty.

 

Vision (V) – True leaders have the ability to see beyond the current reality and project an ideal future. They not only create a vision, but they share it, live it and carry it out. We analyzed each candidate’s ability to share their vision, though we have no idea on which ones can truly execute and which ones are just blowing hot air.

 

Success (S) – Great leaders don’t just make everyone feel good, they also execute (i.e., they get the job done). Proper execution leads to success, and great leaders understand this. We graded each of the candidates on their level of success enjoyed during their previous and current positions.

 

Future (F) – When a great leader departs a company, they leave it in better shape than when they arrived. Additionally, because they were driven with an eye on the longer term, the decisions they made during their time in the position continue to have a positive impact into the future. Our assessment of the candidates includes a grade for how we feel their decisions would impact future generations.

 

H

D

I

V

S

F

Total

Rank

Candidate

8

9

7

8

9

8

82.5

1

John McCain

6

7

9

9

8

8

78.0

2

Sarah Palin

7

8

8

10

8

7

77.5

3

Barack Obama

6

7

6

7

7

7

67.5

4

Joseph Biden

6.8

7.8

7.5

8.5

8.0

7.5

76.4

-

Candidates’ AVERAGE

7.9

8.0

7.2

7.8

7.3

7.4

75.3

-

Presidential AVERAGE

 

We were careful to ignore the popularity of these four, and attempted to judge them solely on the traits that we feel make a good leader. Will they have the ability to execute? Do they possess the necessary honor; intelligence; character; and, most of all, service required to lead the free world? Are any of them capable of true leadership, or will they be just popular pawns of their party?

 

It’s important to note that these rankings are based on how these Presidential and Vice Presidential hopefuls and their decisions would impact a Fortune 500 company. Of course, we know that the task at hand for the next President will prove much more difficult than taking over a large, troubled company.

 

The question every voter needs to ask themselves is this: Is my candidate up to the task?

 

 

Ratings & Rankings of the Presidents of the United States

 

How Do US Presidents Rank as Business Leaders? (Part Three of Three)

 

(This is the third article in a three-series post. Please see the first and second articles in this series by following this link for our notes associated with each President, and this link for our “worst to first” rankings of the US Presidents as leaders.)

 

Where does your favorite President of the United States rank in terms of business leadership in the new millennium? Could all or any of the US Presidents successfully run a large corporation today? Did they have what it takes to be a true leader or were they more concerned about themselves and their legacy? Were their decisions sound and founded on unwavering principles, or were they constantly swayed by the winds of political expediency and public opinion?


 

Running the United States and running a large, for-profit corporation have more similarities than differences. Whom would we choose to run our company if we had our pick of the 42 men who served as Presidents of the United States?

 

The editors at AskTheManager.com scoured the history books and looked deeply at each President’s record as a leader. We ignored the popularity of their decisions and judged these men solely on the traits that we feel make a good leader: the ability to execute; honor; intelligence; character; and, most of all, service.

 

To determine the final rankings, we graded each President in six weighted categories (below), awarding a score of 1 to 10 in each category. A score of 10 indicates this President showed true and complete leadership in a particular skill set.

 

The Six Measures of Presidential Leadership

 

As promised, we bring you the leadership rankings of the Presidents, and the raw scores from each of these six weighted categories:

 

Humility (H) – Great leaders today avoid the spotlight (unless it benefits their company), give credit to their subordinates, and generally drive their businesses through character and vision rather than ego and pride. We considered the amount of unhealthy ego and overbearing pride in each of the 42 Presidents to help determine the scores in this area.

 

Delegation (D) – No one person can do it all, that’s why great leaders are also great at delegation. They thrive on allowing others to make decisions, and they empower nearly everyone through their words and their actions. We graded each of the 42 Presidents on their ability to let go and leave some of the duties to their staff.

 

Integrity (I) – Great leaders are principled, and they adhere to a strict moral and ethical code. They exude character because of their honest, forthright nature; and they never put themselves above the needs of their team or company. Our assessment and category grades are based on each President’s record with respect to character and honesty.

 

Vision (V) – True leaders have the ability to see beyond the current reality and project an ideal future. They not only create a vision, but they share it, live it and carry it out. We analyzed each President’s ability to both share their vision and execute it, and based our grading on these results.

 

Success (S) – Great leaders don’t just make everyone feel good, they also execute (i.e., they get the job done). Proper execution leads to success, and great leaders understand this. We graded each of the 42 Presidents on their level of success enjoyed during their term.

 

Future (F) – When a great leader departs a company, they leave it in better shape than when they arrived. Additionally, because they were driven with an eye on the longer term, the decisions they made during their time in the position continue to have a positive impact into the future. Our assessment of the Presidents includes a grade for how their decisions impacted (or are expected to impact) future generations.

 

It is critical that we remember that all 42 Presidents were great men (if not necessarily great leaders). They each held the highest office in the land and (good or bad) each brought their own flavor to the job. Every President deserves some measure of respect – if for nothing else than the sheer odds they defied to occupy the office of President.

 

(The editors of AskTheManager.com are humbled that we live in a country that allows and encourages the criticism of political leaders. We feel truly blessed.)

 

H

D

I

V

S

F

Total

Rank

President

9

9

9

10

10

10

96.5

1

George Washington (1789-1797)

10

7

10

9

10

10

96.0

2

Abraham Lincoln (1861-1865)

9

9

10

10

9

10

95.0

3

Thomas Jefferson (1801-1809)

10

8

10

9

10

9

94.0

4

Harry S Truman (1945-1953)

10

9

10

10

9

9

93.5

5

John Adams (1797-1801)

10

9

10

9

8

10

93.0

6

Woodrow Wilson (1913-1921)

10

9

10

10

8

9

91.0

7

Jimmy Carter (1977-1981)

9

9

9

10

10

8

90.5

8

Franklin D. Roosevelt (1933-1945)

8

8

8

10

10

9

90.0

9

James K. Polk (1845-1849)

9

8

10

8

9

9

89.0

10

Grover Cleveland (1885-89; 93-97)

9

10

9

9

9

8

88.0

11

Ronald Reagan (1981-1989)

9

8

8

10

7

10

87.0

12

Dwight D. Eisenhower (1953-1961)

9

8

9

9

8

9

86.5

13 (tie)

William Howard Taft (1909-1913)

9

10

9

10

8

8

86.5

13 (tie)

James Monroe (1817-1825)

8

8

7

10

10

8

86.0

15

John F. Kennedy (1961-1963)

10

9

10

8

9

7

85.5

16

Calvin Coolidge (1923-1929)

10

9

10

7

9

7

84.5

17

Lyndon B. Johnson (1963-1969)

8

8

9

10

6

10

84.0

18

John Quincy Adams (1825-1829)

10

7

9

8

8

8

83.0

19

James Madison (1809-1817)

8

7

6

8

10

8

82.0

20

Andrew Jackson (1829-1837)

8

7

7

7

9

8

79.5

21

George H. W. Bush (1989-1993)

9

10

8

9

7

7

79.0

22

Millard Fillmore (1850-1853)

4

6

7

10

9

9

78.5

23

Theodore Roosevelt (1901-1909)

8

9

5

8

7

8

75.5

24

William McKinley (1897-1901)

7.9

8.0

7.2

7.8

7.3

7.4

74.5

AVERAGE

8

8

7

6

7

7

71.5

25

Martin Van Buren (1837-1841)

6

6

9

8

7

7

70.5

26

Chester Arthur (1881-1885)

10

9

6

7

6

6

70.0

27

Gerald Ford (1974-1977)

9

9

10

9

4

6

69.5

28

Herbert Hoover (1929-1933)

5

8

1

9

9

7

69.0

29

Bill Clinton (1993-2001)

9

8

9

7

4

7

68.5

30

William Henry Harrison (1841)

8

7

4

7

7

6

65.5

31

Zachary Taylor (1849-1850)

6

7

8

7

6

6

64.0

32

Benjamin Harrison (1889-1893)

8

8

7

6

5

6

63.5

33

James A. Garfield (1881)

7

7

3

5

6

6

58.5

34

Rutherford B. Hayes (1877-1881)

6

7

2

7

6

6

58.0

35

Ulysses S. Grant (1869-1877)

6

6

5

7

5

5

54.5

36

George W. Bush (2001-2009)

5

7

4

6

4

6

52.5

37

Andrew Johnson (1865-1869)

8

10

8

4

3

3

50.5

38

Franklin Pierce (1853-1857)

5

3

6

5

5

5

49.0

39

John Tyler (1841-1845)

5

9

1

4

4

5

46.5

40

Warren G. Harding (1921-1923)

5

8

2

5

4

4

44.5

41

James Buchanan (1857-1861)

2

6

1

1

6

6

44.0

42

Richard Nixon (1969-1974)

 

 

It’s important to note that these rankings are based on how these Presidents, their traits, their character and their decisions would impact a Fortune 500 company. Are they capable of true leadership or were they just popular pawns of their party?

 

As we grow ever closer to the November 4, 2008 Presidential Election, the real question for America is where would Barack Obama, John McCain, Joe Biden or Sarah Palin rank on this list? With the current economic climate and uncertain foreign affairs, it’s clear we need a leader. To view our fantasy rankings of these four Presidential and Vice Presidential hopefuls, please see our post from September 9, 2008 by following this link.

  

The Best and Worst Presidential Leaders in History

 

How Do Our 42 US Presidents Rank as Leaders? (Part Two of Three)

 

Where does your favorite President of the United States rank in terms of business leadership in the new millennium? Could all or any of the US Presidents successfully run a large corporation today? Did they have what it takes to be a true leader or were they more concerned about themselves and their legacy? Were their decisions sound and founded on unwavering principles, or were they constantly swayed by the winds of political expediency and public opinion?

 

Running the United States and running a large, for-profit corporation have more similarities than differences. Whom would we choose to run our company if we had our pick from the 42 men who served as President of the United States?

 

The editors at AskTheManager.com scoured the history books and looked deeply at each President’s record as a leader. We ignored the popularity of their decisions and judged these men solely on the traits that we feel make a good leader: the ability to execute; honor; intelligence; character; and, most of all, service. To determine the final rankings, we graded each President on six weighted categories: humility; delegation; integrity; vision; success (during their term); and (impact on) future (generations).

 

This is the second article in a three-series post. Please see yesterday’s post by following this link for our “worst to first” rankings of the US Presidents.

 

Today we bring you the leadership ranking of the Presidents, with the promised notes associated with each:

 

The Top 10 Presidential Leaders of All Time

 

The greatest Leader-Presidents ever, we’d happily serve under any of these 10 distinguished men:

 

1. George Washington (1789-1797)

Entrepreneurs understand how hard it is to start a new business, imagine starting a whole country! Often underrated, Washington is truly a “leader’s leader” in that he was always able to get the most out of other leaders, without hurting their egos or resulting to power struggles. In 1787, he presided over the Philadelphia Convention that drafted the United States Constitution and two years later he became the first President of the United States. An enlightened leader, Washington even used his farewell speech to warn against the pitfalls of partisanship and involvement in foreign wars. Kind of makes you wish the other 41 men on this list would have listened to him, doesn’t it? AskTheManager proudly proclaims George Washington as the Best Presidential Leader of all time.

 

2. Abraham Lincoln (1861-1865)

The 16th President of the United States, Lincoln led the US through it’s greatest crisis – the Civil War. Throughout his life and his Presidency, Lincoln showed great regard for his fellow man and a tremendous sense of honor and integrity. If not for Washington, Lincoln would be number 1 – but number 2 on this list isn’t a bad thing. For all Lincoln accomplished from a leadership point of view, he is the 2nd best President who ever served.

 

3. Thomas Jefferson (1801-1809)          

Jefferson wrote the Declaration of Independence, e’s on Rushmore for a reason, and in some ways he was the most successful Leader-President ever. He was a selfless leader who was one of the first to embrace “empowerment” by advocating states rights. Though he didn’t always agree with his own decisions, he chose a path he felt was the best for this country. As a leader, Thomas Jefferson is the 3rd best President of all time.

 

4. Harry S Truman (1945-1953)

“The Man From Independence” made the toughest decision in the history of the US Presidency: to be the first and only world leader to drop nuclear weapons on his enemies. His decision no doubt saved the lives of hundreds of thousands of American soldiers and effectively ended World War II. TheManager asks: would any of us be willing to make the same decision for the sake of freedom? Nearly hated when he left office, he was a humble leader who executed his agenda very well. Truman is clearly the 4th best Leadership President ever.

 

5. John Adams (1797-1801)        

It’s tough being second. While John Adams was only a one-term President, he was actually a very competent, if not reluctant, leader. He life story is dotted with chapters of selflessness and sacrifice. He never seemed to put himself ahead of the needs of the country or the mission at hand. A great Adams’ story involves the defense of British soldiers accused in the Boston Massacre of 1770. Despite his feelings for the British Government and facing a loss of reputation in America, Adams vigorously defended the eight soldiers against the charges. Because his Presidency could also be characterized as one of service to the people, John Adams is the 5th best Leader-President ever.

 

6. Woodrow Wilson (1913-1921)

Thomas Woodrow Wilson was the consummate leader of his time. He defied his party (he was a Democrat) to pass a conservative Republican-backed initiative to create the Federal Reserve System. Most men would have towed the party line, though Wilson did what he felt was best for America. He understood that he served us, rather than the other way around.

 

7. Jimmy Carter (1977-1981)       

One of the last honest Presidents, Jimmy Carter was the first true environmentalist to ever hold the office (don’t try to tell us about Roosevelt, Carter actually cared about the environment). Though vilified by some, he showed great courage in boycotting the 1980 Summer Olympics in the Soviet Union – even though this move likely cost him a second term. Carter was never concerned with himself or his cronies, and once asked for the resignation of several of his cabinet members. Carter was one of the most selfless Presidents to ever serve the United States, and he seemed grateful every day that America allowed him to serve.

 

8. Franklin D. Roosevelt (1933-1945)   

FDR served four terms (a record, of course) and created government programs back when we actually needed government programs. Without the New Deal, we probably would have been in a recession at least another two or three years. Not really worthy of Mt. Rushmore in TheManager’s view, but still not bad given the alternatives. FDR did what he did to help America — a true servant leader.

 

9. James K. Polk (1845-1849)     

Polk made the Top Ten primarily because he exercised leadership skills in the 1840s that would be admired today. More specifically, Polk knew how to execute. If he set an agenda, Polk accomplished it. While President, he oversaw the expansion of territory in the US by more than 750,000 square miles. He was a great negotiator and very adept at foreign policy. Though he was the 11th US President, James K. Polk is the 9th best Leadership President of all time.

 

10. Grover Cleveland (1885-1889 and 1893-1897)    

Cleveland is the only US President to ever serve two non-consecutive terms. Technically speaking, he was our 22nd and our 24th Presidents. Known as a President dedicated to his principles, he is most often characterized as honest, intelligent and independent. Just the qualities we’re looking for in a True Leader. Deservedly so, Grover Cleveland is the 10th Best Presidential Leader of All Time.

 

The Above Average Presidential Leaders

 

Above average among this group says you were something special. These fourteen Presidents clearly distinguished themselves by providing exceptional leadership during their terms in office:

 

11. Ronald Reagan (1981-1989)

The Great Communicator should have been called The Great Delegator. Ronald Reagan epitomized leading through others, and was so respected at the end of his first term that he won 49 of 50 states (what were you thinking Minnesota?) in the 1984 Presidential Election. His hard stance on Communism during the Cold War was a 180 on the detente of the previous administration, and eventually led to the dismantling of the Soviet Union and the fall of the Berlin Wall. If not for record (at the time) deficit spending during his term, he would likely rank in the top ten.

 

12. Dwight D. Eisenhower (1953-1961)

We like Ike, really we do. What we really like about President Eisenhower is he had the ability to forgo immediate gratification for the sake of the future. Most of his greatest accomplishments benefited those not even alive during his Presidency. The US Interstate Highway System and America’s space program are just two examples of his visionary leadership. Even forgetting that he successfully led the Allied Forces in Europe during World War II, Ike clearly deserves to be ranked as the 12th Best Leader-President in history.

 

13. (tie) William Howard Taft (1909-1913)        

Taft’s determined action against trusts and his strengthening of the Interstate Commerce Commission prove he believed his mission as President was not to glorify himself, but to leave a lasting legacy on the people of the United States. Although Teddy Roosevelt helped him get elected to his first term, he chose principles over party for the second term and broke with the self-centered Roosevelt. An honorable man, Taft served as a capable Chief Justice of the Supreme Court for nearly nine years after he left office.

 

13. (tie) James Monroe (1817-1825)

The Presidency of James Monroe is characterized by all the things we want in a leader (and a President) today. He was pragmatic, honest and non-partisan. He made strong cabinet choices based on qualifications and not on personal greed or cronyism. His greatest accomplishments include the acquisition of Florida and the Monroe Doctrine. Though the Missouri Compromise would later be found to be unconstitutional, its passage at the time was considered important for the country.

 

15. John F. Kennedy (1961-1963)         

A second son, JFK was a leader’s leader. He held to his resolve and proved to be wise beyond his years. At 43, he was the second youngest ever elected to the office of President. His service in WWII, and as a both a representative and a senator proved to be too much for the current VP at the time, Richard Nixon. While we will never know how much he could have meant to the US, his stance against the growth of communism worldwide, and his creation of the Peace Corps domestically prove he understood the future better than most Presidents.

 

16. Calvin Coolidge (1923-1929)

Although he was given the nickname “Silent Cal,” Coolidge uttered many phrases that defined his Presidency. “The business of America is business” was one such phrase that belied his belief that the role of the government should be small and that American businesses would drive prosperity and growth. We tend to agree with Silent Cal. A leader of high integrity and distinguished for his character, Coolidge was one of those “accidental Presidents” who served their country first and themselves last. Known best for creating prosperity without the involvement of the Federal government, Coolidge lowered taxes and government spending during his term, proving that the nation could grow without government programs and increased spending.

 

17. Lyndon B. Johnson (1963-1969)    

LBJ earns high marks for his work to improve civil rights and alleviate poverty – as well as the creation of Medicare and Medicaid – though his escalation of troop levels during the Vietnam War proved to be the beginning of a disastrously terrible chapter in American history. To his credit, Johnson’s decisions seemed to be based on what he thought was best for the country, not necessarily what he thought was best for his party or his own political career. In fact, he signed the Civil Rights Act of 1964 with the firm belief that it would lead to the loss of Southern votes in future elections. This demonstrated a level of high integrity that we’ve rarely seen from a President since.

 

18. John Quincy Adams (1825-1829)   

The son of the second President, John Q was actually a better diplomat and negotiator than he was a President. That’s not to say he did a poor job in the White House, he was simply stunning as Secretary of State in drafting the Monroe Doctrine (among many other achievements). As President, he had a great eye for the future: Adams championed such needed US improvement as roads, universities and canals without concern for reelection (which he did not achieve). A selfless leader with great vision, John Quincy Adams is often underrated on lists like these.

 

19. James Madison (1809-1817)

As the “Author of The Constitution” and the “Father of The Bill of Rights,” Madison deserves some slack that historians rarely give him. While usually ranked in the bottom 10% of all Presidents, TheManager doesn’t put as much weight on issues like declaring war against the British and causing the tremendous casualties inflicted during the War of 1812, because Madison’s intentions were not self-directed or self-serving. Though not a great manager, he understood that power rested with the people – most leaders today still forget this. As a Presidential Leader, Madison was certainly above average.

 

20. Andrew Jackson (1829-1837)          

“Old Hickory” led 5,000 Americans against 7,500 British troops in the Battle of New Orleans (1815) and won. Not a completely unbelievable feat until you consider that he lost only 13 men compared to the British losses of more than 2,000. While in office, he is credited with greatly reducing the Federal deficit and sometimes blamed with the creation of the spoils system. A strange dichotomy, to say the least, that puts him near the middle of the leadership rankings.

 

21. George Bush (1989-1993)     

George H. W. Bush would probably rank higher on this list if not for his failure to keep one big promise: “read my lips, no new taxes.” Burdened by the deficit created by Reagan, Bush went against his own better judgment and broke his word with the American people. He would later regret the decision to raise taxes, but it would be too late – Bush was a one-term wonder.

 

22. Millard Fillmore (1850-1853) 

Never elected President, Fillmore assumed office after the death of Zachary Taylor. Taylor’s cabinet was corrupt and Fillmore wasted no time in replacing them all – a bold move that more business leaders should consider today. Fillmore also showed great courage in remaining neutral on Hungary’s independence, event though it meant he would probably give up a chance at reelection.

 

23. Theodore Roosevelt (1901-1909)   

The youngest ever to become President at age 42, his gigantic personality and his record in battle sometime move him higher on lists like these. TheManager wouldn’t put him on the Mt. Rushmore of Leadership, however, because many of his greatest accomplishments seemed more self-serving that the twenty-two Presidents ahead of him. As true Presidential Leaders go, Roosevelt is just barely above average.

 

24. William McKinley (1897-1901)          

Assassinated just after starting his second term in office, William McKinley was a leader who defied the popular opinion on most issues in favor of what was best for America. Although we fought the Spanish-American War during his term in office, McKinley resisted at first, despite public sentiment that we should have fought much sooner. Under McKinley, the war lasted all of four months. McKinley would probably rank higher on this list if not for the many political appointments he made based on friendships and back-office bargains.

 

Our Below Average Presidential Leaders

 

It’s important to note that the bell curve for Presidential Leaders is skewed to the left. As you’ll see in tomorrow’s post, the average leadership score of all 42 Presidents is 75.4 (out of 100). While no company wants a below average leader, most of the below average Presidents could essentially lead and lead well (as here they are ranked against other Presidents, a stringent comparison).

 


The weighted grading used by the editors of AskTheManager assumes top leadership skills are present with a score of 66.7 or above – 2/3 of a perfect score. All below average Presidents scored at least this much except for Zachary Taylor and Benjamin Harrison. (To see all the score, please read tomorrow’s post.)

 

25. Martin Van Buren (1837-1841)         

After serving as a US Senator, the Governor of New York (albeit for two months), Secretary of State and Vice President, Van Buren brought his extensive experience to the office of President. He has the distinction of being the first President to be born as an American citizen, and the third to serve only one term. He was largely unsuccessful at improving the faltering economy of his day, and he was known to make decisions that were politically smart rather than those that were humanely right.

 

26. Chester Arthur (1881-1885)  

Arthur, best known for reforming civil service during his Presidency, showed great courage in office by replacing all but one of his predecessor’s cabinet in an effort to go his own way and avoid cronyism. He also tried to lower tariff rates and instituted the first federal immigration laws, despite political pressures. Not all of his decisions led to prosperity for the nation, though he certainly appeared to lead with the best intentions.

 

27. Gerald Ford (1974-1977)       

An “accidental President” (he never desired the top office) Ford was often unfairly lampooned for his unintended pratfalls. If not for the pardoning of Richard Nixon (the worst Presidential Leader of all time), Ford would probably rank in the Top 20. His humility and his keen understanding of just how lucky he was to serve in the highest office in the land almost make us forget the terrible inflation and recession that occurred under his watch.

 

28. Herbert Hoover (1929-1933) 

Although he completely mishandled the Great Depression, Hoover was actually not a terrible leader. In fact, HH was quite a humanitarian and very progressive in his views on leadership. His generosity toward war victims and his belief that leadership should be “bottom up” versus “top down” made him unique among US Presidents in his era. He’d rank above average on TheManager’s list, if not for that pesky stock market crash and the unnecessary deepening of the recession during his term.

 

29. Bill Clinton (1993-2001)         

Forget about Bill Clinton’s popularity, his integrity and his motives are so in question that he should feel lucky to be ranked in the top 30 Presidential Leaders of all time. Many Americans have no idea how close Clinton came to being convicted of perjury and obstruction of justice charges (and subsequently being thrown out of office). The editors of AskTheManager believe true leaders face the music and take their medicine (to blend a couple of metaphors), and Bill Clinton did neither. Sorry, President Clinton, but in leadership, integrity matters.

 

30. William Henry Harrison (1841)         

The editors at AskTheManager.com feel bad even giving Harrison a grade (he served just over one month), but he did serve, so we’re left with grading him based on what he accomplished with those precious few days in office and his overall makeup as a leader. His high integrity and perceived lack of ego tell us that he could have been a very good leader. Unfortunately, we’ll never know for sure, and based on his lack of notable legislation during his days in office, he ranks as a below average Presidential Leader.

 

31. Zachary Taylor (1849-1850)  

A fan of Nationalism, Taylor is sometimes viewed as a President who stood his ground on the expansion of slavery. In fact, Taylor was a slave owner and merely was unwilling to give to either side on the issue of slavery. Although his term in office was just over one year, the editors of AskTheManager feel he was not going produce great leadership no matter how long he served. His cabinet was corrupt and he was largely ineffective as a leader.

 

32. Benjamin Harrison (1889-1893)      

Although Harrison’s administration was instrumental in passing the Sherman Antitrust Act, his reliance on higher tariffs and excessive government spending cast a fog over his accomplishments. His Presidency was largely non-descript, and he did very little to guarantee continued prosperity or liberty for America.

 

The Ten Worst Presidential Leaders of All Time

 

Shame, shame, shame. These ten men might find it hard to run any business of significant size – certainly they would struggle if their businesses faced threats from the economy or competition. Their lack of noticeable accomplishments and/or general lack of character distinguish this group as the worst Leader-Presidents ever:

 

33. James A. Garfield (1881)       

Six months in office should give Garfield an “NA” in TheManager’s book, but every President gets a ranking. Besides that, his short stay in office was mostly spent squabbling with a rival over a political appointment. He probably could have been a great leader, but Garfield’s priorities were a little out of whack. More time would likely have earned him a better grade, but based on his body of work as a leader, he’s the 10th worst President of all time.

 

34. Rutherford B. Hayes (1877-1881)   

Hayes’ inactivity during office seems more a result of the times than a laissez-faire attitude (though we could be wrong). The actions he did take, like ending Reconstruction with the Compromise of 1877, were politically motivated. While his decisions were often flawed, like sending federal troops to handle the Great Railroad Strike of 1877, we don’t fault Presidents for making bad decisions, unless they were made with bad intentions. Hayes, it seems, may have done just that throughout his Presidency.

 

35. Ulysses S. Grant (1869-1877)          

A President who allowed, if not encouraged, corruption, Grant was not a servant leader and is often overrated on lists like these. While he supported civil rights and cracked down on the Ku Klux Klan, the depression that occurred during his term ushered in a Democratic congress that made him relatively ineffective. His scandal-ridden administration and reports of anti-Semitism tarnish his legacy.

 

36. George W. Bush (2001-2009)           

It’s always easy to attack the sitting President, though all politicians should be judged by history and not by current popular sentiment. That said, the editors at AskTheManager were hard pressed to move W any higher on the list. Many Presidents have had poor popularity ratings, though with W the low opinion seem to come from a definite lack of true leadership. His poor handling of the Iraq War (great leaders admit when they’re wrong and they “fish or cut bait”) and the fact that only 10% of his top cabinet members appointed in 2001 are still with him today, are among the many issues that show Bush deserves to be ranked as the 7th worst Presidential Leader of all time.

 

37. Andrew Johnson (1865-1869)         

Johnson, vice President at the time of Lincoln’s assassination, vetoed many civil rights acts and blocked the 14th Amendment because of his deep feelings of racism. His policies, and his inability to play well with others, led to his impeachment in 1869. Andrew Johnson has the distinction of being the first US President ever impeached and AskTheManager’s 6th worst President ever.

 

38. Franklin Pierce (1853-1857) 

While Pierce assumed the Presidency at a very tranquil time, it didn’t take him long to find controversy as the slavery issue soon came to the forefront. His handling of this and other problems sometimes ranks him as the worst President of all time, though it’s important to note that no other US President has ever assembled a cabinet that remained together for the entire term. Pierce accomplished this despite choosing men with very different backgrounds for his cabinet positions. That, TheManager believes, shows some leadership skills, just not enough to keep him from being ranked as the 5th worst President of all time.

 

39. John Tyler (1841-1845)          

Tyler assumed office upon the death of Tippecanoe (William Harrison) and proceeded to lead so poorly that his entire cabinet quit (save Daniel Webster) and he was expelled from his party. The ability to compromise and to build a consensus are important traits in a good leader – Tyler could do neither and was, therefore, a terrible leader and the 4th worst Presidential Leader of all time.

 

40. Warren G. Harding (1921-1923)       

As leaders go, Harding was a joke. Warren G. looked upon the White House and even the country as his personal play land, letting his cronies loot the government coffers while he looked the other way. By all accounts, he never had an interest in helping the American people or leading anyone or anything. While no one ever proved Harding’s involvement in the illegal bribes and kickbacks during his administration, a true leader would never have allowed any of it to happen. As a leader, Harding gets our vote for the 3rd worst President of all time.

 

41. James Buchanan (1857-1861)         

A do-nothing who allowed the South to secede from the Union, Buchanan was the only US President never to marry and the greatest ostrich manager of all time. His head firmly buried in the sand, Buchanan’s inability to lead led to the Civil War, while his refusal to deal with the slavery issue makes him, in TheManager’s eyes, a coward among cowards. Cowardice has no place in leadership, therefore Buchanan is by our accounts, the 2nd worst President in history.

 

42. Richard Nixon (1969-1974)   

When we look strictly at Tricky Dick’s leadership abilities, we cannot help but be appalled by the incredible paranoia that led to the Watergate break-in and his criminal behavior that followed. While TheManager believes much of what Nixon accomplished (like creating the EPA and OSHA) was with the best intentions, there are no excuses for his imperialism, the secret bombings during the Vietnam War, and his disastrous wage and price controls. Congratulations Dick, as a leader, you are the worst President of all time.

 

It’s important to note that these rankings are based on how these Presidents, their traits, their character and their decisions would impact a Fortune 500 company. Are they capable of true leadership or were they just popular pawns of their party?

 

To see the final scores and rankings in each of the six weighted categories: humility; delegation; integrity; vision; success (during their term); and (their impact on) future (generations), please follow this link.

 

As we grow ever closer to the November 4, 2008 Presidential Election, the real question for America is where would Barack Obama, John McCain, Joe Biden or Sarah Palin rank on this list? With the current economic climate and uncertain foreign affairs, it’s clear we need a leader. To view our fantasy rankings of these four Presidential and Vice Presidential hopefuls, please see our post from September 9, 2008 by following this link.

 

How Would the Presidents of the United States Rank as Business Leaders?

 

How Would The 42 US Presidents Rank as Business Leaders?

 

Where does your favorite President of the United States rank in terms of business leadership in the new millennium? Could all or any of the US Presidents successfully run a large corporation today? Did they have what it takes to be a true leader or were they more concerned about themselves and their legacy? Were their decisions sound and founded on unwavering principles, or were they constantly swayed by the winds of political expediency or public opinion?

 

Running the United States and running a large, for-profit corporation have more similarities than differences. Whom would we choose to run our company if we had our pick of the 42 men who served as President of the United States?

 

The editors at AskTheManager.com scoured the history books and looked deeply at each President’s record as a leader. We ignored the popularity of their decisions and judged these men solely on the traits that we feel make a good leader: the ability to execute; honor; intelligence; character; and, most of all, service. To determine the final rankings, we graded each President on six weighted categories: humility; ability to delegate; integrity; vision; success (during their term); and impact on future generations.

 


From worst to first, here are the AskTheManager.com rankings. (Please note: there are only 42 ranked Presidents even though George W. Bush is considered the 43rd President. Grover Cleveland’s two terms were not consecutive, so he is referred to as the 22nd and 24th President. On our list, we only count him once.)

 

The Bottom Ten

 

Distinguished by their inability to lead with integrity, humility and/or vision, these ten Presidents deserve their own Leadership Hall of Shame:

 

42. Richard Nixon (1969-1974)

41. James Buchanan (1857-1861)

40. Warren G. Harding (1921-1923)

39. John Tyler (1841-1845)

38. Franklin Pierce (1853-1857)

37. Andrew Johnson (1865-1869)

36. George W. Bush (2001-2009)

35. Ulysses S. Grant (1869-1877)

34. Rutherford B. Hayes (1877-1881)

33. James A. Garfield (1881)

 

The Below Average Group

 

Many of these Presidents made notable contributions to the country, but overall they lacked many of the traits it takes to be considered a good leader:

 

32. Benjamin Harrison (1889-1893)

31. Zachary Taylor (1849-1850)

30. William Henry Harrison (1841)

29. Bill Clinton (1993-2001)

28. Herbert Hoover (1929-1933)

27. Gerald Ford (1974-1977)

26. Chester Arthur (1881-1885)

25. Martin Van Buren (1837-1841)

 

Our Above Average Presidential Leaders

 

Though not the greatest of all time, these fourteen Presidents distinguished themselves as good to very good leaders. Their ability to drive the country through tough times all while keeping an eye on the future helped most of these Presidents accomplish great feats of leadership:

 

24. William McKinley (1897-1901)

23. Theodore Roosevelt (1901-1909)

22. Millard Fillmore (1850-1853)

21. George H. W. Bush (1989-1993)

20. Andrew Jackson (1829-1837)

19. James Madison (1809-1817)

18. John Quincy Adams (1825-1829)

17. Lyndon B. Johnson (1963-1969)

16. Calvin Coolidge (1923-1929)

15. John F. Kennedy (1961-1963)

13. (tie) William Howard Taft (1909-1913)

13. (tie) James Monroe (1817-1825)

12. Dwight D. Eisenhower (1953-1961)

11. Ronald Reagan (1981-1989)

 

The Top Ten Presidential Leaders of All Time

 

As we’ll clearly detail in tomorrow’s post, these men stand out as the best leaders ever to serve as President of the United States:

 

10. Grover Cleveland (1885-1889 and 1893-1897)

9.   James K. Polk (1845-1849)

8.   Franklin D. Roosevelt (1933-1945)

7.   Jimmy Carter (1977-1981)

6.   Woodrow Wilson (1913-1921)

5.   John Adams (1797-1801)

4.   Harry S Truman (1945-1953)

3    Thomas Jefferson (1801-1809)

2    Abraham Lincoln (1861-1865)

1    George Washington (1789-1797)

 

It’s important to note that these rankings are based on how these Presidents and their decisions would impact a Fortune 500 company. Are they capable of true leadership or were they just popular pawns of their party?

 

This is the first article in a three-series post. Please follow this link for comments that detail why we ranked each President where we did.

 

On Monday, September 8, 2008 we released the final scores and rankings in each of the six weighted categories: humility; delegation; integrity; vision; success (during their term); and (their impact on) future (generations). To see this post, follow this link.

 

As we grow ever closer to the November 4, 2008 Presidential Election, the real question for America is where would Barack Obama, John McCain, Joe Biden or Sarah Palin rank on this list? With the current economic climate and uncertain foreign affairs, it’s clear we need a leader. To view our fantasy rankings of these four Presidential and Vice Presidential hopefuls, please see our post from September 9, 2008 by following this link.