Best Reviewed Lesson in the Book…
(One of the 83 quick and practical life & work lessons from Sh*t Sandwich: Quick & Practical Success Lessons for Practically Anyone.)
Changing a Little Changes a Lot
Would you like to appear more confident and competent to everyone you meet? More than that, would you like to actually be more confident and competent in real life?
Believe it or not, outwardly embracing five little changes in your life will help you create an air of confidence and competence that will permeate your very soul (because of cognitive dissonance, right?) helping you to actually be more of both:
- Be wrong. One of the greatest drainers of confidence that can lead to an inward and outward perception of incompetence is the fear of being wrong. Supremely confident people aren’t always right, they’re just not afraid to be wrong. It’s time to embrace being wrong once in a while. Like a failure, you should celebrate being wrong, because it means you’re honestly contributing to the project/job/relationship/etc.
- There’s enough for everyone. If you believe something like a job promotion is in scarce supply, then you begin to obsess over why you may not be qualified for a promotion, or you begin to resent anyone who receives one. Having an abundance mentality – that is, believing that there is enough for everyone – allows you to overcome petty jealousies and unproductive competitions and focus on the team’s goals. Those who focus on team improvement over self-enrichment are more often perceived as confident, competent leaders.
- Listen with interest. Listening with interest means you’re not talking; and if you lack confidence, not talking is a good thing. Confident, competent people listen more than they speak, because they have nothing to prove.
- Speak with certainty and clarity. When you do speak, speak as if what you are saying is a proven fact. Confident, competent people don’t utter weak statements or ask roundabout questions. Moreover, their sentences aren’t filled with a bunch of “ums.” Whether asking a question or making a statement, their message and meaning is always clear.
- Celebrate small wins. Every win is a win; and every win should be celebrated. This means being excited for yourself and for others when small wins are achieved. Those who lack confidence can always find the clouds in life. While confident people celebrate and savor every silver lining.